It’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of the holidays and forget what’s most important. Gifts don’t have to be expensive or elaborate. They should be remembered for a long time. The best gift comes from love.
A few days ago, I was shopping at the mall and decided to get something to eat at the Food Court. When I received the order, it was wrong. When I informed the person who took the order that I didn’t order tomato soup, she told me that she’d asked me twice, and I confirmed that I did want tomato soup. She then abruptly threw the tomato soup in the trash and served me the split pea soup. I then waited for the avocado toast that I’d also placed. When I sat down and opened the avocado toast, it was missing the tomato. The internal battle between ego and spirit began as I wanted to show the server that the second part of the order was also wrong. Instead, I resisted, ate lunch, and went on to shop.
While walking around, I realized the miscommunication about the tomato soup had to do with my deleting goat cheese and balsamic vinegar from the avocado toast. When she asked me if I still wanted the tomato on it, I replied yes. Somehow, that’s why she thought I wanted tomato soup. Well, after my shopping, I was going to go back and explain my version of what happened.
While buying some candles, I received an extra candle as a gift. I was pondering who to give it to when the answer became clear. When I went back to the Food Court and asked for the server, I could see she didn’t want to deal with me again. When I handed her the candle, in the pretty ribboned bag, and told her I could see she was having a tough day, and I hoped she’d feel better, she started crying and kept saying, “You didn’t have to do that.” I started crying too. It was what A Course in Miracles calls a ‘holy encounter.’ We’ll probably never meet again, but we will remember that moment of love and understanding forever.
Since that day, I’ve tried to make someone feel good every day. Sometimes, the challenges are harder, and my dark side emerges. It feels like the universe conspires to test my ego a little bit more. The good news is that I can see myself and quickly remove myself from a toxic situation or apologize for my own reactions. Progress, not perfection.
We all have many opportunities to give the most important gift of all. Nothing replaces love and kindness. It’s free, and its flame is everlasting. Will you share your light with someone today?
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Donna Marks is an educator, licensed psychotherapist, and addictions counselor in Palm Beach, Florida. She has worked with over 6,000 clients. Donna’s struggle with addiction brought her to a worldwide search for healing. She became licensed as a Mental Health Counselor in 1987. In 1989, she earned a Doctorate Degree in Adult Education, then became Certified in Addictions, Gestalt Therapy, Psychoanalysis, Hypnosis, and Sex Therapy. Donna developed an award-winning addiction training program at Palm Beach Community College. She co-owns an outpatient treatment program and serves as a consultant to treatment centers. For 36 years, she has taught A Course in Miracles.
Donna is the author of three books: the multi-award-winning title Exit the Maze: One Addiction, One Cause, One Cure, and Learn, Grow, Forgive: A Path to Spiritual Success, The Healing Moment: Seven Paths to Turn Messes into Miracles of Love, and her latest fiction, Fortis & Sapiente – A Tale of Two Lovers Who Successfully Navigate the Murky Waters of Love. Donna is a public speaker and has shared her methods with millions of listeners on podcasts and radio shows.
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