Three Steps to Overcome Uncomfortability

It’s human nature to strive for comfort and avoid unpleasant states. Sometimes, being uncomfortable is a sign of something wrong — a bad decision, an omen, or being played by someone. But sometimes, short-term discomfort is simply a state of resistance toward making a positive change. For example, studying extensively is uncomfortable, yet that’s how we learn a new skill or trade. Going without sleep or a routine is unpleasant, but we temporarily sacrifice those comforts when we decide to have children. An exercise routine is challenging, but that keeps us in shape. People who overcome addiction are willing to be uncomfortable without their vice until they replace self-destructive behaviors with self-love.

We don’t need to be driven by a part of our mind that doesn’t have our best interests. If you have a personal challenge and want to succeed, there are ways to overcome that resistance.

#1. Recognize the Discomfort—Many of us are on autopilot. We aren’t aware that our bodies are being directed by a part of our minds that tell us what to do. We’ve been negatively influenced by outside forces like advertising or the power of bad habits, and we don’t take back our power. The mind resists change, especially if it’s not easy. So, when the going gets tough, it tells us to stop what we’re doing and return to our old ways. Like the many times I quit smoking. I was fine until something painful or stressful happened, and that part of my mind encouraged me to have a cigarette. Just one. Then, it didn’t take long before one led to two, led to five, and then, before I knew it, a pack and giving up the resolve to quit altogether. When we take on a project, whether it’s to engage in a new behavior or get rid of something, we must recognize that we aren’t going to feel comfortable at first. Failure to see the discomfort will keep that state in control of our decision-making process.

#2. Be Willing to be Uncomfortable– If you want to be successful in life, you must be willing to tolerate moments of discomfort. This means you embrace all your feelings — pleasant or unpleasant. Once I learned how to ignore the voice that urged me to have a cigarette when I felt sad, anxious, irritable, etc., and experience the feeling of wanting to smoke without lighting up a cigarette, I gained two critical skills. First, I realized it was okay to tolerate discomfort, and nothing terrible would happen. Yes, I might want to scream or cry, but I didn’t have to smoke. Second, I realized that it subsided once I decided it was all right to feel this way. It lifted like a dark cloud. Yes, it returned occasionally but with less intensity, followed by more strength and resolve to succeed. This feeling of having the power to control my decisions without some unconscious puppet pulling my strings grew stronger than the desire for immediate gratification to do something harmful and unhealthy.

#3. Get Support– Anyone sincere about making difficult behavioral changes must be willing to get support. In working with many people over the years, it’s evident that those who accept support are the most likely to succeed. A support person is someone willing to guide you and to whom you can be accountable. Even more important, that person is there for you in moments of weakness and can provide additional strength when needed. If you’re serious about personal growth in any form, consider what type of support you need and be sure to engage. That person can give you tools to feel better and remind you why you want to succeed. Even if you could do it alone, why would you? Support is a gift you can give back to someone else when they need help. This creates perpetual success and worldwide changes — like people who stop drinking, learn healthy eating or exercise habits, or just personal growth. It also explains why so many people have been able to succeed with challenging goals — such as 12-step programs that have helped millions.

Change is uncomfortable, but you can channel any negative emotion into personal empowerment. You aren’t at the mercy of discomfort. You can overcome anything when you recognize it, allow yourself to feel unwanted emotions, and get help. Anytime you are ready and willing to embrace the uncomfortability of change, you have taken the first significant step to success. After that, you need only recognize that you are worth the effort and that positive change is at hand. If you want your truest self, then no amount of effort could be too much. It’s all an investment in the best version of you.

JOIN OUR MOVEMENT TO SAVE MILLIONS OF LIVES FROM ADDICTION.