Three Reasons to Celebrate Independence

This week, we will be celebrating the 4^th of July, the day we adopted the Declaration of Independence in 1776, declaring freedom from the rule of Great Britain.
As a free nation, we grew into a world superpower. Our country’s freedom allows people to share their gifts and talents and become independently successful and that’s why we keep expanding individually and as a country.
Independence is a gift. But not everyone embraces it, and some people are confused by it. But being free to separate and become independent is a cause for celebration, not only for our country but for individuals as well.

# 1 – Independence Represents Maturity
Whether you’re discussing the birth of a child or the birth of a nation, they all need to be dependent initially. A new country can’t grow and mature any more than a newborn can care for itself. Support is needed for guidance and resources until certain stages of maturity have been reached.
Maturity is emotional and physical. Until a child or nation can stand on its own two feet and achieve emotional stability, it’s not possible to become fully independent. This means there are enough resources to separate from the current source(s) of sustenance and produce enough independently.
Emotional maturity represents readiness for the challenges of independence. The ability to manage the stress of adulthood and disappointments, not being too proud to receive support when needed, and getting along with others, are necessary components of emotional maturity. Without enough emotional maturity, it would be difficult for someone to get along with others. No one can stand alone in every area of their life. And even for loners, they must depend on other people for certain resources.
Emotional maturity goes beyond getting what you want. It also involves learning how to regulate emotions and strive to be the best version of yourself.

# 2 – Independence Provides Opportunity for Growth
Moving from dependency to independence is challenging. When we look at nature, the younglings just naturally become independent when they’ve learned how to be self-sufficient. But for humans, the process takes longer. Some individuals just naturally strive for independence early on, while others must be gently guided toward self-sufficiency.
Sometimes, parents don’t facilitate independence — perhaps they are afraid to let go of their children.  They might fear the child isn’t capable of self-care. Sometimes a child’s independence represents no longer being needed or the parent being alone. In these cases, it could mean an emotional war — either internally or externally for everyone involved. Raising children from a fear-based model never fosters independence and always increases a child’s anxiety and dependence.
Regardless of the level of motivation, moving out of dependency is an adjustment and an opportunity for growth. It allows a person to discover self-sufficiency and how to adjust to the world and all its nuances. It means weaning off being cared for and caring for yourself.
Whether it’s exciting or scary, being independent means the opportunity for emotional and financial growth. You are accepting the challenge of being responsible for food, shelter, clothing, and life outside your immediate family while continuing loving relations with them. This can be a mixed blessing of finding your way in unchartered territory and enjoying the feeling of independence simultaneously.

# 3 – Independence Provides an Opportunity for Success
The greatest gift of independence is discovering one’s innate gifts and talents. Every person has something special to offer the world. Most of these gifts can be turned into bringing joy or service to others — either monetarily or otherwise. When these natural abilities are supported and cultivated, it allows an individual to monetize those talents into a career. When they’re not, a child loses their natural desire to be self-sufficient. Rather than naturally transitioning to independence, they become scared and stuck.
Success involves more than making money. It also means fulfilling all life’s dreams — aspirations and goals. When independence is fostered, the child develops a sense of inner-confidence and over time, formulates a plan for future success. Just as that first step is rewarded with clapping and hurrahs, independent talents and interests are reinforced with encouragement and support. Then that early interest in building things, making something, or learning about a particular topic, turns into a satisfying and rewarding adult (sometimes youthful) career.
Unlike the origins of the U.S., independence need not be a battle. Great Britain was heavily invested in the development and cultivation of this country and didn’t want to let go — understandably. Sometimes, caretakers don’t want to let go for similar reasons. Initially, the American pioneers were content with the symbiotic relationship with their mother country. But as Britain increasingly forced tyrannical rule,[1] the costs for inter-dependency became too great.
Independence is a gift, and one we must embrace and treasure. Regardless of whether it’s offered freely, or we must fight for it, it is a must if we are to be whole and happy. We all need others to best function and survive — the blend of healthy dependence and independence is essential for maximum functioning.
Let’s remember this 4^th of July to be grateful for our independence. Having the freedom to mature, grow, and be successful is a wonderful blessing. Let us embrace it and never take it for granted. May we always till the soil and nurture our young in ways to foster independence so that their own garden transcends ours. Independence attained from love instead of war will always better serve the best interests of all.

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